I’m stuck in the car waiting to pick up my husband at the airport. It’s almost midnight, and I am so ready to see him! He left early this morning, so it hasn’t been 24 hours, but we’ve had such a rough couple of weeks that I don’t like being away from him for even this long.

On Friday I bought a book about being your husband’s help meet. This term comes from Genesis 2:18 – “And the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.'” I had heard of the term before but had written it off as part of my past life as a non-submissive woman. (Not that I’ve succeeded as a submissive wife, but I’m in a much different place now.) I skimmed through the table of contents and think it’ll be an interesting read. Maybe it will help me open up my soul even more toward wifely submission.

As I’ve mentioned, we’ve had some rough weeks and even contemplated walking away from the CDD lifestyle. We’re not going to do that, but I have to work very hard to show that I’m committed and submissive. My actions have to speak louder than my words. I’m ready to do so, and I’m craving discipline. I really am. I need it to set me straight and refocus. But it’s his decision.